Faithful

There's distance in the air and I cannot make it leave

I wave my arms' round about me and blow with all my might
I cannot sense you close, though I know you're always here
But the comfort of you near is what I long for

When I can't feel you, I have learned to reach out just the same
When I can't hear you, I know you still hear everyword I pray
And I want you more than I want to live another day
And as I wait for you maybe I'm made more faithful

All the folly of the past, though I know it is undone
I still feel the guilty one, still trying to make it right
So I whisper soft your name, let it roll around my tounge,
knowing you're the only one who knows me
You know me

Show me how I should live this
Show me where I should walk
I count this world as loss to me
You are all I want
You are all I want

-Brooke Fraser: "Faithful"

Inspiration

I just saw the movie Blindside and all I have to say is: WOW; LOVED it!

Winter

The dry, frigid winter has come to embrace the High Desert again and I’m finally done with finals! Hurray! I am so looking forward to sleeping in, drinking hot beverages, gift wrapping and most of all: reading! My mind becomes so thirsty for literature during the semester while it is fed mostly with the cut and dry textbook writing style. So bring on the books!
I’m currently reading What Is God Waiting For? Embracing The Divine Delays In Your Life by Marlinda Ireland and Don’t Waste Your Life by John Piper. I would also like to find a novel to read in the near future so any suggestions are welcome!
This season I have found amazon.com to be invaluable for my Christmas shopping! I don’t typically shop online, but these last few weeks have been frazzled and scattered thanks to the various commitments I’ve made. I have very nearly purchased all my Christmas gifts using the internet, however sacrilegious that may sound. The best part is they’re delivered right to my door. :-)
About two weeks ago, my computer practically exploded (In Natalie language that means that it got a virus.) and I lost all my pictures, music, and documents from this semester. What a disastrous event that was. I was amazed to find out how much I really do “store my treasure on earth” in the form of pixels and megapixels. So now I basically have a “tabula rasa” for a computer as I had to reset it to its original state and start from square one. I’m accepting donations in the form of email attachments with any fun pictures from the last year!
Here is one that I was able to salvage:

My Jr. High Tribe

Blessings on you all during this Advent season.

AVID

After a couple months of paper work, board meetings, finger printing, and 16 hours of training I am finally an AVID Tutor! AVID is a program for Jr. High and High schools which focuses on building the skills necessary for college entrance and success. This program has done an excellent job of leveling the playing field for all children with college and career goals and I’m quite excited to be a part of it. So far I’ve led one tutorial which was somewhat of a “crash-course” for me as I wasn’t supposed to be giving tutorials until next week.

I believe that in giving the first tutorial I made a wonderful group of little enemies. The tutor training session made it very clear that AVID Tutors must maintain a certain amount of professional distance from the students in order to get the highest performance from the students. I am to be kind and caring, without succumbing to or allowing any of the antics which are prevalent among Jr. highers. I whole-heartedly agree with this method, yet, the application is a bit difficult. Of course I want them to like me! But alas, it is not to be, as I happened to lead the tutorial of students from the “in-crowd.” The sighs, eye rolling, and profanity were not what I expected to be welcomed with!

However difficult this endeavor may turn out to be, I feel like the Lord has me immersed in this age-group for a reason. Between tutoring and tribes I am completely surrounded by pre- and mid-pubescent children. I hope I will be able to make a positive impact on many of these hurting and troubled students.

Living Radically

This afternoon I was at home working on some homework with the television on (which is a bad studying technique by the way) and then it hit me! BAM! Every commercial that came on used the words “indulge,” “convenience,” “easy,” “fast” or some other variation of these self-gratifying words. It is so disheartening to see what our culture has put on the pedestal: ourselves! Good ol’ number one.

Our culture enforces the antithesis of what the Bible encourages. How are children of God to follow in the wake of Jesus when such conflicting messages are bombarding them at every turn? Is the purpose of life to satisfy our gluttonous, lustful, rebellious selves? Absolutely not, yet that is what the world preaches. “Whatever feels good is right.” “Find your truth.”

This fact is bothersome because it hits so close to home. So often I want what is easiest, most convenient, and I want it now. I want answers to my questions now. I want to attain what others have and I want it fast.

This reoccurring theme of selfishness has so permeated the human race that it is not seen as wrong. It is acceptable and easy. Self-sacrifice and self-control are not valued. What a pity!

Application: this is where I always falter in my grand ideas and philosophies. Instead of pointing my finger at this obvious flaw in humanity I need to focus on how I should go about my life in a way that would make a difference. And that requires self-control and self-sacrifice. It certainly takes a great deal of faith to live in a way that is difficult especially when there is an easy way out: the world’s way.

“Then [Jesus] said to them all: ‘If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.’” (Luke 9:23)

Let us live radical lives for Christ and actually do what he commands of us! Let's "indulge" ourselves in the love of Christ by loving others and sacrificing our own comfort for the good of the Kingdom of God.

Love is a chance we should take

Hello my friend
I remember when you were
So alive with your wide eyes
Then the light that you had in your heart was stolen
Now you say that it ain't worth stayin'
You wanna run but you're hesitatin'
I'm talkin' to me

Don't let your lights go down
Don't let your fire burn out
'Cause somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don't you rise up now?
Don't be afraid to stand out
That's how the lost get found
The lost get found

So when you get the chance
Are you gonna take it?
There's a really big world at your fingertips
And you know you have the chance to change it
There's a girl on the streets, she's cryin'
There's a man whose faith is dyin'
Love is calling you

Don't let your lights go down
Don't let your fire burn out
'Cause somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don't you rise up now?
Don't be afraid to stand out
That's how the lost get found
The lost get found

Why do we go with the flow
Or take an easier road?
Why are we playin' it safe?
Love came to show us the way
Love is a chance we should take
I'm movin' out of the way

Don't let your lights go down
Don't let your fire burn out
'Cause somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe
(Stand out)
Don't let your lights go down
Don't let your fire burn out
(Stand out)
'Cause somewhere, somebody needs a reason to believe
Why don't you rise up now?
Don't be afraid to stand out
That's how the lost get found
The lost get found

So when you get the chance
Are you gonna take it?
There's a really big world at your fingertips
And you know you have the chance to change it

Chico!

I traveled up to Chico this last weekend to take a look at CSU Chico. I absolutely LOVE it up there and cannot wait to go back. :-) I would love to write more about it but I'm actually quite sick and don't have much energy for writing. Here is a short video I put together of my time there.

melancholy

Sometimes I feel like life has left me in the dust. I don't want to exist, I want to LIVE!

And not just for the future, but for the present.

This week I just existed.

Pathetic.

One Down

I turned in my first college application tonight. Wow, let me rephrase that. . . I turned in my first college application tonight as an upper-division transfer student. Woa, I guess time does fly! It's shocking to think that after this semester I will have completed half the necessary requirements for a B.A.

I've changed and grown in so many ways since high school. I hope this rate of change doesn't continue for the rest of life because I find it exhausting! (Well, it is exciting too.)

Oh, yes. . . my new major = Liberal Arts with a Literature emphasis.

Goal = credential in single subject instruction.

I think God has finally pushed me over the edge. Apparently He has decided that the ONE career I refused to embark upon is the one that is best. . . at least for now.

Nutrition is still in my interests though, I plan to pursue that subject for the rest of my life. :-)

Netflix

This summer I discovered the beauty of Netflix thanks to my online "Film as an Art Form" class. First, I explored different interpretations and adaptations of classic novels such as Jane Eyre, Pride and Prejudice, Persuasion, Sense and Sensibility, Northanger Abbey, Emma, Mansfield Park and other, mostly British novels. It is quite fun to see how the same book can be interpreted differently and explored through an entirely different medium than text.

Recently, I've been interested in the many documentaries out there. I've been especially caught up by the documentaries that are based on the books by Lee Stroble. (Stroble is a Christian journalist who documented his journey from Atheism to Christianity based on solid evidence.) His documentaries include "The Case for a Creator,""The Case for Christ," and "The Case for Faith." I find that these documentaries are complimented by the recent "Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed" by Ben Stein.

I'm also quite excited to watch other documentaries about health such as "King Corn."

All in all I find that Netflix has opened up an entirely new world of discovery! It enables me to learn in a much faster way. It is such a discouraging thing to realize that one can read for an entire lifetime and still not read all the great novels, biographies, or informational works that are present in this world. At least Netflix has allowed me to expand my knowledge double-time.
( NO, I did not get paid to write this.) :-)

Road Trip Video

Well, I have had this video in a state of partial completion for quite some time. It's been sitting on my computer just waiting for the pictures from my cousin's camera. But I have decided that awaiting their arrival is futile as my cousin is quite busy and I'm sure has completely forgotten that the pictures even exist! Therefore, this is a semi-complete timeline of our road trip through the Midwest. And as I was the photographer, there are many sections which were not recorded because I found it difficult to operate a camera and a motor vehicle simultaneously. I know that it is a rough cut video, and that it is probably very boring for most people as it includes many road sequences. (Hence the term "road-trip") But I hope it is still fun to watch. I ended up cutting quite a few portions of the original video because got to be fairly lengthy. Unfortunately, it is still long but I found it hard to condense 4,000 miles into 8 and 1/2 minutes! :-)

I hope everyone enjoys it!

Much love,

Chin up!

Whoa! It sure has been a while! I guess I got out of the routine of writing but don’t worry I’ll reinstate it! Life is currently quite busy, in a good way. After the upsetting start of the semester, I’ve gotten involved with some extracurricular activities such as: Jr. High ministry at HDC, work at “The Island,” and I’m currently in the training process to become an AVID tutor at one of the local Jr. High schools. I’ve also been trying to spare time to help my grandparents move out of their house in Arrowhead. So that’s life in a nutshell. I don’t really have anything specific to write about tonight but I wanted to update my blog so that people don’t think I’m still drowning is self-pity; I’m not. :-)

Aurora and I all ready for 80's night at Jr. High "Tribes."